I admit that much of my writing in this story was rushed. That may be the reason for the lack of emotion in the lines. This is especially prevalent in the section where Barid, Brightbeard, and Kur'nak join. I didn't have the time or energy to devote to fleshing it out, if I was to get it in before the deadline.
I am, at least, glad that the characters come through. I devoted as much work to Ilraen as was humanly possible, being that I am borrowing him. I could say the same about Earwig but, honestly, he is my character, and usually being borrowed by Nesh.
I will have to go over this again at some point in the future to make it better. It will take more time than I have at the moment, but it will get done eventually.
For the record, my involvement in the Team Nevermind story was actually pretty minimal. I nudged some of Ilraen's and Nume's lines a bit, but beyond that it's all Phobos' writing. I was thoroughly... more
It does tend to go turn and turnabout - as she said, Earwig was brilliant at first but fell flat towards the end (that 'Oh by the way random people please join' line in particular), while the last... more