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Matt L.
Mon Jul 20, 2015 10:52pm


Doctor Carla Letsos was a thin 40-something woman with long black hair and oval shaped glasses.
Chalk white skin, fairly attractive features, clothed in a white lab coat over her dress of a silver hue.

The office was roomy and comfortable looking, lazy-boy rocker instead of the traditional couch.

“Have a seat Ms. Castle. May I please refer to you as Tracy?”

Tracy looked nice but not especially extravagant in a black spaghetti string T-shirt and blue jeans.
Tracy’s brown hair worn downward, curling just above her shoulders, favoring her exquisite face.

“Yes, please, do”, Tracy answered, a little nervous about the visit.

“Then please call me Carla. I understand you work for Maggie at the welfare bureau, she says you’re a perfectionist for the rules but we’re not here to talk about work.”

Tracy nodded as Carla brought up a stool and sat next to her.

“I’ll share a little about myself first and then you can tell me about you. This way we can create the illusion that we’re two friends cheerily chatting instead of doctor - patient. Does this make sense to you?”

Tracy smiled, “Yes, Carla. Makes me more comfortable for one thing.”

Carla cleared her throat and began, “I’m been in this field for twenty-years, graduated second in my class of 229, some of my techniques are squarely old fashion, a few of my methods are innovative.
I’m related to Maggie through marriage, our husband’s are cousins.

“Your turn, Tracy”, Carla said with an intriguing smile.

Tracy shared some general information with Carla. About pulling off decent grades in college but nothing exceptional, being hired at the Government Department Of Financial Aid which was only meant to be a source of income until something better came around. About her relationship with Ted Slang, his ambition and economic standing, and their engagement.

“Does Ted makes you feel worthwhile, would you say that you have a significant emotional attachment to Ted, is there much affection in your relationship?”

Tracy spoke in vague terms, Carla jotting everything down on her notepad.

Ted did make Tracy feel special and she was indeed fond of him, and Ted was indeed amorous in affection, Tracy enjoying the romantic episodes more than anything else.

“Ted is the first guy in the big leagues that showered me with attention”, Tracy reflected aloud at one point.

Carla inquisitively asked what Tracy meant by big leagues and she replied in a bubbly mode.

“Wealthy, affluent, a gentleman. The type of man who has the reputation full of class. The guys I dated before Ted were okay but either they were immature or just wanted to party and waste money,”

“Money seems too be of momentous importance to you, Tracy. Is that why you’re so discriminating toward applicants for welfare?”

Tracy’s facial gesture grew antagonistic, “Of course. Some people are deadbeats, they need to work, I’m opposed to giving handouts to lazy people!”

“Okay”, Carla serenely uttered, then brought up Ted again.

“Changing streams, you’ve a history of being at odds controlling your weight, lately it appears that it’s becoming a challenge again. Does Ted know you used to be heavy and how do you think he would react if you became heavier?”

Tracy’s body language became defensive, her voice soft and fragile, “No, I never told him. What point is there? It was years ago and until recently my figure was fine.”

“Go on”, Carla encouraged Tracy; “Does Ted have any bias toward heavy people, especially females?”

“Yes, I’m afraid Ted is very narrow-minded in this, he thinks fat … I mean heavy people, specifically females are lazy, uncultured and….. and unattractive.”

“And, Tracy, do you share the same opinion, is this the reason you lost weight and wish to remain slim?”

Tracy skirted eye-contact with Carla who instructed her to continue, “I can’t help you if you’re not willing to open up your feelings.”

“Okay, okay”, Tracy blurted, feeling as if she was being interrogated.
“Ted might be all about looks and yes, he can be superficial but you have to understand, Ted is a fitness nut, he’s physically fit.”

Carla nodded, Tracy continued, “To be honest, pretty girls, the ones who get to wear beautiful clothes, who turn heads, the women asked out by the best type of men are all slender. We get all the attention, everything seems right when you’re attractive. Being fat, I felt dumpy, the upper class guys kept their distance, even the guys who did like me back then, they’d be sweet and attentive toward me but once a skinny babe would walk by or say hello, I was demoted to being a friend. Sucks, right.”

“I’m not here to share my opinion, Tracy. But I’m going to help put you back on course; however, your cooperation is notably urgent.”

“Yeah, whatever you need me to do, Carla”, Tracy heaved a subtle sigh.

“Very well!” Carla enthusiastically announced as she left her seat, “Then let’s get to work!”

Tracy watched as Carla walked over to the medicine cabinet and prepared a syringe and then grabbed a bottle of alcohol and a few cotton balls.

Returning to the stool, Carla explained as she coated Tracy’s upper arm with the alcohol, “I’m going to inject you with Denoticpenathal, it’s something of a drug that works on your cognitive dissonance, essentially the emotional stress caused by having conflicting opinions. It’s completely harmless although you’ll feel some fatigue.”

Carla picked up the syringe, “Say ow….”

Tracy grimaced, uttering a quick “Ouch!” as Carla injected her with the drug.

“Okay, Tracy, this will take a few minutes to work, just relax until everything is ready.”

Tracy rubbed her arm, “Sure, Carla. You think this therapy is going to work before Ted gets back? I’m very apprehensive about him seeing me naked with these extra pounds.”

Carla answered in an ambiguously dissertation, “Depends on the validity of your circumstances based on the complexity within your subconscious, your primal urges against conditioning and the artificial factors forced by your ego.”

“I’m only hoping to lose ten pounds!” Tracy humorously rattled off.

Carla called her receptionist into the office and together they arranged a few things regarding Tracy’s therapy.

A slid projector was brought in; the movie screen attached to the ceiling was maneuvered downward with use of a string. Carla adjusted the ‘Lazy-boy rocker’ in an almost horizontal position, and finally had the receptionist bring Tracy a glass of chocolate milk with a few cookies.

“All comfy, Tracy?”

Tracy grinned, “Yeah, but isn’t this kind of unconventional?”

“Well, I did say that some of my methods are innovative. If anything, you’ll get your money’s worth from our session.”

The lights dimmed unto blackness, Carla operating the slide projector sitting next to Tracy.

“I hope you don‘t mind but I did some investigation work on you. High school year books, social networking, various other items which I felt absolutely necessary to accomplish the best results for your therapy. Now please, state your name and age as we view the snapshots and something about yourself at the time the photograph was taken.”

The first photograph depicted Tracy in a sweater and jeans, quite slim.

Tracy did as she was told, and in a bubbly tone, “Tracy Castle, about 17-years of age. I’m in junior year of high school, trying out for the cheerleading squad around this time. I was mainly dating Steve West but there were a few other guys who really liked me.”

Carla chimed in, seemingly well aware of Tracy’s history.
“Yes, Tracy. Cheerleaders were always on the top rung of the social ladder even when I went to high school. Popular, preppy, attractive. You did try out for the squad, what happened next?”

Tracy began nibbling on the cookies.

“Oh wow, I did make the squad but around the middle of school year I began gaining weight.
I was allowed to join the girls during practice but other than that I mainly handed out towels.”

“Was it perhaps the stress, the pressure in looking your best, to fit in with the other girls that may have provoked the weight gain?”

Tracy guzzled a portion of milk.
“I think that makes sense, Carla. I never needed to watch my weight before, not really. I did go through a short period prior too this when I was starting to get a little bit chubby.”

Carla inquired about her food choices and appetite during this time.

“I was always snacking, fast food, sweets, constantly, literally all the time.”

“Did you diet before this time or when you were previously a little bit chubby?” asked Carla.

Tracy sighed, “Only for maintenance purposes. If my clothes felt tight or stuff like that. I do recall being cautious with what I ate weeks before the tryout.”

Carla shared her theory, “This actually makes sense, Tracy. You denied yourself your favorite food which is the cause, overeating the effect. Such behavior merely instigated your appetite, influencing the mechanics within your psyche that restrains self-control.”

The next picture was a face shot of Tracy, her cheeks puffy, a sliver of a double chin.

“Tracy Castle, 18-years of age”, Tracy obliged Carla with the facts.
“I was sort of insecure then, my senior year of high school. I had a new diet every week, didn’t have a steady boyfriend but I did date. I was in the preppy clique, my friends, most of them cheerleaders.”

Carla asked Tracy for some additional details.

“I really ballooned, at graduation I was approximately 190-pounds, some of the guys tagged me with the nickname ’Jumbo-Thighs’ since I carried most of my weight on my thighs and belly. I felt, really felt like I was the fat friend, at least that’s how I sort of considered it. At prom, all my friends were civil towards me but I sensed they were being nice because I was much heavier than them. I didn’t fit into their clique, they didn’t even invite me to the after prom party.”

Carla meticulously added her hypothesis, “You had developed a bond with them when you were slim, putting on weight changed the relationship. They remained loyal which explains the motive behind permitting you to socialize with them. However, due to the weight you put on and the change to your appearance, it is apparent that by prom their allegiance had run its course. You had become an interloper.”

“Next!” Carla blurted out loud. This slide revealed a very pudgy looking Tracy in a pink with wavy blue pinstripes T-shirt and butchered brown shorts. The pixie hairstyle, with her bangs dyed blond and a dash of turquoise, advanced the roundness of her face, especially showing off her double chin.

“Tracy Castle, I’m 19, I had just spent a summer at a fat farm. I was really upset, only losing 14-pounds, I slacked off the program the counselor suggested and resigned the idea that I’d ever lose weight. I didn’t pay attention to what I ate or how much, by the end of autumn I tipped the scale at my heaviest, 231-pounds.”

Tracy tossed the remaining cookies into her mouth, speaking as she chewed, “I hung out with a different crowd, was dating a guy I met in fatty-ville, most of the people I knew were through him.
I did keep in contact with a couple of my high school friends, but we didn’t really see each other all that much.”

“This young man you dated”, Carla asked, “On what level was this romance? Did you have an emotional bond?”

Tracy swiftly ran through the facts, “Frank something, I don’t remember. Yeah, we did …there was an attraction ….nothing more than making out but I was a different person then…”

“You found Frank attractive”, Carla interrupted, “Did he lose much weight at the fat camp?”

“No, he didn’t. I thought he was cute though and there was something about guys with big bellies that_.”

Tracy paused for a moment, “Please go onto the next slide.”

“Are you embarrassed about your feelings toward Frank? Feel awkward about your appearance?”

“All of the above!” Tracy snapped back. “Look at me, I’m almost a blimp!”

“What happened between you and Fred?” Carla asked.

“Our relationship was getting very intense; we even started planning a future together. Spoke about having…”

Silence ensued, prompting Carla to exhibit the final slide.
Tracy looks somewhat slender in a baggy sweatshirt and jeans. Her brown hair sweeping her shoulders, her facial appearance has notably changed.

“Tracy Castle, I think I’m 21, maybe 22-years old. I went to see a psychologist, over a few months and through hypnotism I got my eating under control. I’m something like 140-pounds in that photo.
I dumped Fred almost immediately after I began losing weight, by the time I reached 23, I finally reached my goal at 124-pounds.”

“You dumped Fred? I thought you were fond of him; you found him attractive, right?”

Tracy sighed, “All Fred…. Fred was a couch potato, no incentive for anything except lying around the house and eating. If I was still with him, I’d be huge.”

“That’s all very interesting, Tracy”, Carla demurely replied, “And logical. We’re all selective toward mates, usually choosing romantic partners that mirror our own physical appearance. When you lost weight, Fred’s appearance was no longer satisfactory, and thus you made yourself accessible to males that were physically similar to you. What you need to ask yourself, Tracy, had you remained heavy, would you be happy in a relationship with a heavy man as long as he respected you and was affectionately attentive, and supportive of your size.”

“Yeah”, Tracy admitted in an offended tone, “Possibly. I hate to admit this but I was starting to develop Fred’s habits and didn’t seem to mind it. I had such a big appetite then and wouldn’t even bother doing anything remotely exciting. On weekends I’d just sit around the house in my nightgown stuffing my face and watching TV. But I’m a changed woman now, I feel attractive and there are many social advantages that I wouldn’t have if I was still overweight.”

“I believe the right guy would make you feel attractive even if you weighed 300-pounds”, Carla tossed the idea into Tracy’s lap.

Tracy didn’t reply to Carla’s remark, instead she brought up the moment that made her determined to lose weight.

“I’d be close to that weight for sure if it wasn’t for my cousin’s wedding. All the other bridesmaids looked perfect, beautiful in their gowns. I looked like a typical fatty. It was then that I decided to get back on track and_.”

Carla politely listened as Tracy brought up the various factors that managed to get her overeating under control and ultimately lose weight. There was a bit of cosmetic surgery, a laser procedure that removed the dimples from her thighs, a bust lift and tummy tuck. Tracy then bragged about her beauty, and the benefits of being slender.

Finally Carla interrupted Tracy, “You’ve been slim for going on seven years now, until recently you began gaining weight?”

Tracy answered to the affirmative.

And with that Carla stood up and turned on a single lamp, the light illuminating over Tracy’s face.

Carla instructed Tracy to once again state her name and age.

“Tracy Castle, I’m 29-years old.”

Carla amiably informed Tracy, “Now state your name but progressively say the numbers backward.”

Tracy sighed in confusion but obeyed Carla, in due course reaching 19.

“Stop there, Tracy. Remember how you were at age 19. Say it again, with conviction.”
“Tracy Castle, 19, I’m 19 - years old.”

Carla had Tracy repeat it a few more times.

“You’re 19 years of age, Tracy. You have a vigorous, uncontrollable appetite, diet is not a word in you vocabulary, you enjoy eating, haven’t a rhyme or reason to lose weight. Do you understand?”

Tracy wheezed nervously, “Yes. Carla but I thought you were going to help me lose weight?”

Carla nodded, “In order to accomplish the technicalities that are holding you back from the veracity of your ego, it’s important to establish the activities or lack of activities within the cognitive structure of your mind in order to bring balance and fruition to the ideal branch of behavior that is completely adequate to your natural identify. Do you und

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