A Narcissist’s Guide
Thu Oct 5, 2017 9:30am

Wow! Dana Milbank completely nails Trump's visit to Puerto Rico. Note: "John Barron (along with "John Miller" is Trump's alter ego which he used to call reporters and brag about himself. Did you ever wonder who Trump's son "Barron" is named for? ...

And now, to Dana Milbank:
A Narcissist’s Guide to Helping Others Understand It Is All About You

(Excerpts. I highly recommend reading the whole article.)

Natural disasters and their man-made counterparts (mass shootings, terrorist attacks) pose an obvious challenge for those living the Me-Driven Life. These events are frustrating, and inconvenient, because they tend to cause those people to think about their own problems: their injuries, the loss of loved ones, their hunger, thirst, discomfort, life-threatening cholera, what have you.

This is a common character flaw, and it is harmful because it distracts them from their more pressing obligation to think about you.

It is likely that this loss of perspective is temporary, but even a temporary loss of focus on you is dangerous. It must be arrested and reversed as quickly as possible. You can help these people by getting them to stop thinking about their own concerns and to redirect such destructive thoughts. Here are a few practical steps to return others’ focus to where it appropriately belongs.

First, show them what extraordinary things you are doing for them. Use adjectives such as “great,” “amazing” and “incredible” frequently when referring to the work you have done. Some examples: “I think it’s now acknowledged what a great job we’ve done.” “We get an A-plus.” “We have done an incredible job.” Don’t be afraid to tell them the work you and those who work for you have done “is really nothing short of a miracle.”

Be sure to highlight those who affirm you and your centrality to the situation. This positive reinforcement encourages others to drop thoughts of themselves in favor of thoughts about you. If somebody praises you, say, “He started right at the beginning appreciating what we did,” or, “He was saying it like it was, and he was giving us the highest grades.”

Visual aids can help. If people need food, for example, don’t just hand out bags of rice and paper towels. Make a show of it! Toss supplies through the air as if shooting baskets. If people gather at the scene of disaster, make them all appear to be your fans simply by saying “What a crowd!” or “What a turnout!”

The sad fact is, when a disaster causes somebody to dwell on his or her pain or loss, they are not capable of fulfilling their obligation to you. They must be jolted back to reality. Tell them what they are going through is not a “real catastrophe.” Tell them the death count is low, or say their disaster doesn’t measure up to other disasters. Telling them to “have a good time” and letting them know “you don’t need” emergency supplies will help them realize their catastrophe is not as central to them as you are. To the extent they believe they are suffering, you need to convince them that this is only because they are not helping YOU. Say, “They have to give us more help,” or, “They want everything to be done for them.”