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Raine Collindale
Not in the spirit of things
Thu Oct 20, 2016 05:16
115.178.26.160

Raine was on her own. It was a strange feeling. Although she was a quiet person, she tended to enjoy being around the hustle and bustle of other people, which was lucky, given that she’d grown with a twin and a constant swirl of exuberant extended family coming and going. Or perhaps that was the reason why she was like this… She occasionally liked a break and would take herself off for a quiet walk but today was different. Today she had been left alone, and it gave her a drifty, loose-endy kind of feeling.

Kyte had gone to the spirit club meeting. He saw the fun, the chance to dress up, to twirl fire (maybe, if they were allowed) and do things he enjoyed. Normally, they did most things together but Raine just couldn’t get behind spirit club. It was all about expressing things she didn’t really feel. She was coming not to hate school so much. She liked seeing her friends. But on the whole it still made her feel trapped and homesick. She still was made to feel constantly stupid for failing to be good at a bunch of things that she would never even use in her real life. She was never going to have to write answers to theory questions whilst performing in the circus! And the concept of school spirit baffled her… Like, they were supposed to be so proud of coming to this particular school? Like it wasn’t just an accident of geography, or where their parents had gone? Kyte didn’t feel school pride either but he could just shrug it off and get excited about doing stilt walking and stuff, whatever it was in the name of. Raine couldn’t. That felt like lying.

She wandered down one of the paths until she found a quietish looking spot. She had decided to use this time to meditate, although even this was something she was more used to doing in quiet solidarity with others. Still, it would be good to clear out the cobwebs. To try to push out all the worries, all the homesickness, and just focus on one little moment in time… She settled on one of the stone benches and shut her eyes. She tried to focus on the here and now. The most obvious sensation was the cold of the stone that she could feel through her thin, patchwork skirt. She opened her eyes, convinced she’d felt the prickle of someone watching her, but it was just her imagination. She shut them again but she was finding it hard to rid herself of that sensation. The third time she opened her eyes, it proved to be valid, because someone was indeed there.

“Hello,” she smiled. She supposed it beat being alone all by herself, and if she couldn’t get into her meditation because she felt like someone was there all the time, better that they actually were than that she kept disturbing her concentration for nothing. “I was trying to meditate but I can’t really find my focus today,” she added, in case they wondered what she’d been doing.

    • Feeling slightly the sameTess Whittaker, Fri Oct 21 14:48
      Being back at Sonora was definitely going far better than Tess had expected. The distractions of everyday school life did help take her mind off all the things she couldn’t control, although she was... more
      • Well, at least we've got company thenRaine, Sun Oct 23 07:57
        “Oh hey, Tess. No - it’s nice to see you,” Raine smiled, when Tess checked she wasn’t disturbing her. She was glad for the opportunity to catch up with her friend. Things hadn’t been so great for... more
        • And company makes things a lot better!Tess, Mon Oct 24 14:36
          Tess smiled back at Raine, glad her presence wasn’t unwanted. It was nice to spend some one-on-one time with her friend, as much as she did love it when they were all in a group together. She bit her ... more
          • Happy and hoping to helpRaine, Tue Oct 25 06:24
            Tess decided to answer her question fully. Raine steeled herself, ready for Tess to say difficult things where she might not know the right thing to say in response. She’d asked her, after all, and... more
            • And you are helping!Tess, Wed Nov 9 15:06
              Raine was such a good friend. There was something very relieving about being able to say what she was thinking, sure that Raine wouldn’t judge her for it. And more than that, Raine knew exactly what... more
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