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Happy and hoping to help
Tue Oct 25, 2016 06:24

Tess decided to answer her question fully. Raine steeled herself, ready for Tess to say difficult things where she might not know the right thing to say in response. She’d asked her, after all, and she wanted to give Tess a chance to talk about it. She just hoped she made a good enough listener that the other girl didn’t regret it. She let her friend ramble through a few sentences, only picking up when she was asked a question, even if it had been intended rhetorically.

Why can’t Emma just be a normal little baby?

“Because she’s not,” answered Raine simply, squeezing Tess’s hand gently. People were who they were. And life threw at you what it chose. What you made of that was then up to you. “It doesn’t mean she’s not going to turn out to be a completely awesome, wonderful person though. She probably already is, just it’s hard to get to know her right now. And sure you’re doing something. I bet you’re sending her good thoughts every day.” Most other people would have talked about the experts taking care of Emma, how she was in the best possible hands, but Raine wasn’t the biggest fan of doctors. She knew better than to say so to Tess, but she wasn’t going to repeat bland platitudes that she didn’t believe. She felt very sorry for tiny baby Emma being surrounded by stern people in white coats all day, who probably saw her as a bunch of problems to sort out rather than a proper person.

“Do they…. Do you…” she paused, unsure how to ask the question, or whether it was even an ok thing to ask. She knew that Emma was in hospital but wasn’t sure of the exact… nature of the situation. “Might it turn out that everything’s ok? Or do they know that she… That… there’ll definitely be…” she faltered. She didn’t know how to ask and regretted starting the question. “Sorry… I probably shouldn’t ask,” she apologised, even though she hadn’t managed to actually finish a question.

“I’m fine, thanks,” she answered, it being the more or less truthful answer. Sure, she’d been in a bit of an odd mood, finding herself with nothing to do, but now the universe had gifted her a Tess, so all was well. “I just needed some company,” she added, to make sure Tess knew that her presence really was welcome and not an interruption.

“Meditation, the kind I do, is also called mindfulness. The idea is to stop thinking about… well, more or less anything. We spend a lot of time dwelling on things in the past that we can’t change, or worrying about the future but without being able to control it. And that’s where most of our misery comes from. When you’re being mindful, you’re able to switch all that off. You just think about the present moment. You try to tune all your senses in - what can you feel, what can you hear and smell, and by turning those on you sort of try to turn all your other thoughts off. Does that make any sense?” she asked.

  • And company makes things a lot better!Tess, Mon Oct 24 14:36
    Tess smiled back at Raine, glad her presence wasn’t unwanted. It was nice to spend some one-on-one time with her friend, as much as she did love it when they were all in a group together. She bit her ... more
    • Happy and hoping to help — Raine, Tue Oct 25 06:24
      • And you are helping!Tess, Wed Nov 9 15:06
        Raine was such a good friend. There was something very relieving about being able to say what she was thinking, sure that Raine wouldn’t judge her for it. And more than that, Raine knew exactly what... more
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