Let me teach you.
Tue Nov 5, 2013 12:34

He barely withheld his flinch as Alexandra reached towards him once more, but her touch was suddenly tender, the gentle stroke of pale fingers against his stung cheek, and despite himself Niccolò leaned into her touch, closing his eyes for a brief moment, more confused than ever. What are you doing to me? He opened his eyes to match her gaze, but there were never any answers to be found in those ice blue irises, only ever in the inferno of their desperate, clumsy kisses that told him i need you, i want you and that had to mean love, even if she couldn’t say the words, even if it didn’t mean she wanted to marry him.

Niccolò…” He stood quietly, waiting for her to speak, looking for clues, glints of hope cracking through the hardened shards of glass piercing her skin, sinking deeper, armored blood vessels pumped into her heart and he could shatter her, he could break her, he could make her give in and be his - be mine, Alexandra, be mine - but he was afraid of almost destroying her, everything about her, so he held back and waited uselessly, hoping she’d be strong on her own, and choose him without him having to desperately fight for it.

It’s not a question of…” He couldn’t listen, he closed his eyes, trying not to hear her words. “...wrong. I am already engaged.” To that faceless Chino Espinoza who lingered in the darkness, a laughing threat bound to the smoke, and Niccolò tasted ash in his mouth, blisters stitched across his tongue, his lips drenched in hot wax. “ point in pondering.

Alexandra turned away from him, her next words slapping him in the face, and an almost strangled sound choked Niccolò’s throat, chocolate eyes flashing with glints of ember, enraged by her cold dismissal, and she had never before been so terrible or so beautiful. He stepped forward and grabbed her shoulders, pulling her roughly to him, letting the pain and anger shine through his features, his warm breath blasting her face. “All we have - all that matters, Alexandra, is our feelings. My love for you… it’s stronger than my love for my family, my love for our society. I am yours - you must understand that. I belong to you in a way I never knew was possible. If I could… if I could simply walk away… it’s impossible, Alexandra, I would…”

There was a savage roar overtaking his body, his fingers clenched around her shoulders, but she had hurt him in the most violent way possible and he couldn’t let go, desperate and panicked and there was still hope cracking across his spine like the dance of flames, that hottest part of a match, where the light flickered blue. “Tell me you don’t love me. Tell me I don’t matter enough. Tell me to walk away and to never speak to you again, because if you don’t then we have to be together, we have to find a way to be together because all that matters - all that should matter is that we’re happy. Tell me I can’t make you happy, because if you don’t then I can’t go away, and I can’t forget you, and I’ll spend my life chasing after you.”

He wasn’t crying… he wasn’t crying… blinking furiously at the strange prickle irritating his eyes, the tinge of salt flavoring his lips, and Niccolò kept his voice at a rough whisper that scratched and tore at the muscles flexed and bulging inside his throat. “Don’t do this to me, Alexandra, please… tell me there’s no hope or tell me you do love me, that’s all I need to know, because I swear to you - I swear that that’s enough to overcome anything. And that’s enough to keep us happy.”

  • I don't speak that one.Alexandra, Mon Oct 14 00:12
    It was over in an instant, her demanding questions, but all at once, she knew what she had done. Alexandra had taken all of the trust and hope and everything else good in her empty shell of a life,... more
    • Let me teach you. — Niccolò, Tue Nov 5 12:34
      • Firm hands attached to Alexandra’s shoulders and pulled, and romantic words of poetic standards buzzed in her ears, but she refused to look at their source. After outbursts, she had mustered a bit of ... more
        • You're a terrible student.Niccolò, Wed Nov 6 23:10
          The night had started off terrifying, so promising, and the scent of hope was a little like gasoline; overwhelming and maybe a little foul, but undeniably powerful and clung to the skin, and if a... more
          • I guess I've flunked.Alexandra, Fri Nov 8 17:12
            Niccolò released her, and without realizing it, Alexandra retracted, taking a couple slow steps back as she rubbed the ache out of the shoulder his dominant hand had gripped, the one that hurt more.... more
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