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Mea culpa yer Honour!
Mon Aug 27, 2018 21:26

I've always been fond of woofers as you know but the small ones not so much. Mid size is my favourite, large ones can be too much to handle never mind they cost a bomb to feed but little ones have a bark like an ice pick in the ear'ole.

I've done my best to be fair and even handed towards Daniels and Marias dogs, whilst at the same time making it obvious Herbert is #1. The little Shitsu - Hailey - I am finding it increasingly difficult to tolerate and last night I'd have drop kicked her the front door for a nickel.

She's been 'spoiled' {pampered, over indulged, tolerated) all her life and she's been trying every trick in the book to get me to treat her like that which I wouldn't do for Herberts sake even if I didnt find her a manky, smelly, scruffy, hyper-active little shit with a pushy and unlovable character.

The last two nights she howled and yapped all night long in an attempt to get me to let her flea infested carcase into the bedroom (she wont let me bathe or spray her) and the little bastard bites if you attempt to treat her and her teeth are no joke, sharp little things.

Another cute trick she has learned is how to open lever door handles or if that fails she'll hurl herself against the door till the latch pops. I have to rest my airgun against the door to hold it firm. So I've had two nights of being under siege and it sounds like it complete with battering ram!

Last time we got stuck with the dogs, the oher one Christmas was a stroppy pain in the arse who tried to throw her weight around with Herbert and Hillary. Herbert was still a puppy then but this time round she nipped that one in the bud straight away and Christmas has been good as gold ever since.

I think Herbert is a saint. I know she's really hoping for a solid excuse to give Hailey a good shaking which would finish her off in a second. Herberts neck muscles are like a buffalos shape. She knows I'm getting to the end of my tether with the little shit and today she gave me a look as if to say "Oh go on, I can sort this toerag out in no time. Please?"

I bestowed two of my sausages on her and told her what a well behaved dog she is and how much I value her company.

    • Purse dogs; mea culpa too - sarge, Tue Aug 28 08:09
      I don't know who started it with the little inbred monstrosities, probably the Chihuahua which are one of the ugliest creatures ever. My loathing for purse dogs might have had some bounds, but they... more
      • tsk tsk - mike , Tue Aug 28 12:13
        Nice imagery reminiscent of the teen vulgarity of superman comic speculations by us school boys, what would a super prick do to lois lane? Of course they couldn't get it on, he'd kill her!
      • Shit zoo? Nice one! - mike, Tue Aug 28 11:14
        The little bastard tried even harder to keep me awake last night and then when all else failed took a piss on the floor by way of saying eff you. I forgot to mention whilst listing its annoying... more
        • You have to tell us... - Sarge, Tue Aug 28 16:00
          ...what happens when she comes to get the little turd. I bet the dam thing gets picked up, held tight, a stream of baby talk, and the little effer glares at you on the way out the door. Maybe even... more
        • A companion rather than... - sarge, Tue Aug 28 15:55
          ...a needful spoilt toddler. I get it! Grrr the Marmalade Manx and Hobbes the Ginger Tom both stretched out, Grrr on my legs and Hobbes on my chest. Lovely nap. The Nap of Equals.
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