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Re: Rough ideas for a start
Mon Sep 10, 2018 10:42

Somewhere I must have missed reference to the Citadel.
Did it suddenly appear in the story or was a Citadel common to the time and area? This is probably picking nits but it did come as a surprise.

You do seem to find ways to get your characters traveling.

  • Rough ideas for a start - mike, Sun Sep 9 16:37
    I'm unable to say that I'm entirely happy with this example of a beginning, I'm sure it requires rearranging and quite likely needs trimming too. Just a starter.... Working title:- TIMOTHY... more
    • Re: Rough ideas for a start - roger, Mon Sep 10 10:42
      • The Citadel - for Roger - mike, Mon Sep 10 11:16
        I drew a map which, although a work in progress, I sent a copy of to Sarge. I'm sure I've mentioned this whole new story idea somewhere here? Well, to recap, its loosely based upon my favourite... more
        • Re: The Citadel - for Roger - roger, Tue Sep 11 09:00
          I had no idea that London was also called the Citadel. Thanks.
        • Country names? - sarge, Mon Sep 10 13:10
          How about Brythony or Brython (a nod to the Celt language of the Britons). Those I rather like really, but your pleasure comes before mine here. Anglia might be more obvious, though it does roll off... more
          • I'll go with BRYTHAN - mike, Mon Sep 10 14:08
            I like your suggestions especially Anglia and Midland would have been my choice except its too close to Middle Earth but BRYTHON works best only I'll alter the spelling a tad.
            • Glad... - Sarge, Mon Sep 10 14:49
     have contributed something a bit more "mature" today. He hee!
    • I like it... - sarge, Sun Sep 9 18:13
      ...though I wonder if the name is purposely chosen to flash back to a perfectly hideous school life, Tinkletap a primary school boy's dream name for a willy... The imagery of the setting is good,... more
      • No! Damn you - laughs - mike, Sun Sep 9 18:31
        Its onomatopoeic! Tinkle Tap the sound of metal and hammer
        • Re: No! Damn you - laughs - roger, Mon Sep 10 10:33
          Mike, Now you see how some of think.
        • Grin! - Sarge, Sun Sep 9 18:57
          I am such a ten-year-old boy! I very much like the onomatopoeia, now that you point it out, If you do want some distance from us who delight in our sometimes immature male sense of humour though,... more
          • Hopefully... - sarge, Mon Sep 10 13:17
            ...the country name suggestions make up for my male immaturity (which was intended 90% to amuse and I hope taken thus). Grin!
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