TEEN GIRL PANTSING / STRIPPING DISCUSSION BOARD
Annie
Re: Feedback
Thu Nov 29, 2018 02:47
204.83.77.91

I liked the concept very much, and the addition of the cold was a very creative touch. If you are looking for ways to improve your writing, and to make it easier to read and enjoy, I would recommend focusing on punctuation. You often use commas where there should be periods, which gives the story a peculiar cadence and makes it difficult to get a good flow. On the whole, your work shows a lot of promise: keep it up!

  • Feedback - Perfect Stranger, Mon Nov 26 02:33
    Hello everybody I recently published my 2nd ever story called Mollie gets catfished. Nobody has written any feedback at all and as an author its quiet demoralising. I will certainly start to provide... more
    • Re: Feedback - Annie, Thu Nov 29 02:47
    • Feedback - XP, Wed Nov 28 20:21
      I'm usually more of a lurker, (although I've posted a few storied "from the web"), but I enjoyed the old Mollie should have swiped story, as well as the new catfishing one. They were both well paced, ... more
    • Re: Feedback - Anonymous, Wed Nov 28 06:10
      i didnt write any feedback because i didnt like it
      • Feedback - Perfect Stranger, Wed Nov 28 15:54
        Why didnt you like it. Is the build up too slow? Do you prefer things less realistic? I am trying to write stuff that hasnt been done before, adding a little character development and extra layers to ... more
      • Re: Feedback - nachtmuziek, Wed Nov 28 09:22
        Don't be a dick. It's fine if you didn't like it, but if that's all you're going to say without providing some constructive criticism or advice then keep it to yourself.
    • Re: Feedback - nachtmuziek, Mon Nov 26 11:46
      I really enjoyed the story! I liked the humor and as a teen it feels a bit more familiar than other stuff I read here sometimes.
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