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We’ll figure it out
Wed Aug 15, 2018 10:26

Nathan let Isis move away. He understood that sometimes people just needed to move when they were distressed and Isis was clearly distressed. His heart sank a little when she declared she wasn’t okay with the situation, and he felt a stab of sadness when she claimed to be a bad mom. He suspected that was the root of her distress. It was a terrible thing to believe about yourself (Nathan didn’t think it was true, but he wasn’t sure how to convince her otherwise) but a small tension inside him loosened because as uncertain as Isis was of her ability to parent, at least the problem didn’t seem to be that she didn’t want to parent. That was important.

When she said she was scared, he went to her and silently wrapped her in a hug. He said nothing for a long time, partly because he just wanted to be there with and for her, and partly because he was trying desperately to figure out what he could say to ease her fears and admittedly justified anxiety. Isis did not exactly have the best relationship with her current daughter and had voluntarily given up her parental rights to her firstborn. It was hardly a background that inspired confidence in future child rearing activities.

Nathan himself was forty-nine years old. He had basically written off the opportunity to have children as lost almost a decade ago. When he asked Isis to marry him, he’d known children would be a sticky topic and had decided he would leave that choice up to her. He wouldn’t pressure her, or even raise the suggestion until she gave a sign that it was something she wanted.

Well, that plan was smashed down into paste.

So he was scared too. Maybe knowing that would help her. So he admitted, “I’m scared, too. I’m almost fifty. I figured this ship had sailed for me. But we’ve got each other. We’ll learn this parenting thing together, the old man and the false start mom. That’s something you didn’t have last time around. We’re a team, and we’ve got support.” He gave a gentle smile, “My mom has been bemoaning that all her grandsons have outgrown her babysitting and how much she misses it.”

Nathan would not deny that such pointed bemoanings had influenced his decision to pop the question sooner rather than any later, but he had warned his mother not to expect grandchildren or even the wedding anytime soon.

That plan got smashed to paste, too.

“And my brother raised three boys who all survived to their teen years, so we can ask him questions, and Sophie’s youngest will just be a couple years older, so maybe she’ll be interested in playdates.” He chuckled in a way that was only a little forced. “She may even try to foist old baby things off on us to get it out of her house.” His brother had done the same when Dylan was getting too big for those things. Not to Nathan, of course, but to his wife’s cousins who were having babies.

“And I think even Louisa will be glad to have a baby visit her. She asks after Nevaeh often enough.”

He pulled back and squeezed Isis’ hands. “We’ll figure it out. This time you’ll get a fair shake at being a mom.”

  • Pretty much - Isis, Tue Aug 14 18:38
    Of course. Of course Nathan was trying to plan and make things work even though it was a total wrench in all of the existing plans. Of course he was going to make sure it was all okay, even if it... more
    • We’ll figure it out - Nathan, Wed Aug 15 10:26
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