It hurts
Fri Jan 13, 2017 11:29

Ooc: First let me apologize profusely for an illegally short post last time. I had premature submission and had to run to do New Years Eve family stuff, and there was already a reply before I could get back to do anything about it. (Whoo, amazing post!) So this one is extra long and hopefully redeems me. BIC:

Nathan smiled as she dropped her protests and agreed to join him and his parents for lunch on Christmas. "Great, it's a date then." Probably not a particularly romantic one, what with his mom and dad present and all, but having his girlfriend meet his family was kind of a big deal, right? So he was counting it.

After that, he sat with Isis, flipping though the photo album, meeting her family, if in absentia. Isis had two older siblings. Interesting. For some reason, he'd been under the impression she was an oldest child, if she had any siblings at all. Maybe because she just seemed so self-sufficient.

And there she was, baby Isis. "Aw, you were cute," he said, then worried this might be the wrong thing to say and hurried to repair any imagined damage by giving her a grin and a quick peck and saying, "Still are, too."

"I'm sorry," he murmured, gently squeezing her hand a few pages later, when he learned she had lost her dad young. He couldn't begin to imagine how tough that must have been. His own dad had always been such a large comforting presence in his own childhood, even when the man was making him get off the couch to go outside and toss a baseball around when neither of them actually enjoyed the activity. Dad felt it was Important Bonding Time As American Males, and Nathan guessed maybe there was merit to it; the catch game had been beyond dull, but it had been a good time to just chat one on one with Dad, and that was a treasured memory.

Baby Isis grew into Kid Isis and then Teenage Isis. She got another little sister and a step-dad? who left them. Nathan made a sympathetic sound there, too, but it was outside his experience and he wasn't sure how best to comment on it. Time continued to march forward in the photos, though, so he didn't seem expected to say anything.

In addition to her late father, and the mother who put together the album (Nathan thought she did a fine job, though he was unclear on whether she was still alive; Isis hadn't said she had passed like she had specified for her father, and she had used the present tense when speaking of her craftsmanship skills, but on the other hand, Isis had possession of the album now, and he couldn't recall her talking about her mother much at all. Nathan talked about his mom at least once a week, so he was guessing at this point Isis' mom had also passed, possibly recently), Nathan also noticed the sudden absence of the older sister. He didn't ask though, because if Isis wanted to talk about it right now, she would have narrated it as she had her father and step father's loss.

And then there was The Picture. My baby with her baby, read the caption. It featured the person he had come to recognize as Teen Isis. And she was pregnant. Very pregnant. Like, way too pregnant to have gotten an abortion pregnant, even though he was quite sure she never talked about a kid of her own now.

He felt, he didn't know how he felt. This was far far far before him so there was no jealousy. He felt something though. Sorrow, he thought, regret for the loss of a young innocent life. Two of them probably.

Isis slammed the album closed and Nathan jumped slightly, startled by the sound.

She stammered and wouldn't look at him. He put an arm around her, seeking to pull her into a hug. He said softly, sympathetically, "I'm so so sorry. Was it a stillbirth?"

If he couldn't imagine losing a father, his ability to comprehend what it must have been like to lose a child when still a child herself was entirely beyond him. His heart hurt for her.

  • And mistakes. - Isis, Mon Jan 2 03:05
    “Oh, no, you don’t have to-” Isis began immediately, but her protests died in her throat. She didn’t like hand outs, but, as she reminded herself, letting him buy lunch once was not the same thing.... more
    • It hurts - Nathan, Fri Jan 13 11:29
      • You can say that again. - Isis, Sat Jan 14 03:51
        His arm stretched around her. She didn’t lean into it, but still. It was… nice. “Was it… what?” Of course. Of course Nathan was being kind and supportive and sympathetic and understanding and... more
        • It hurts - Nathan , Wed Jan 18 12:02
          Nathan was going to go ahead and assume 'a very rough time before this job' was about equivalent to saying 'Santa had a lot of places to visit tomorrow night.' True certainly, but beyond the limits... more
          • Hopefully it's a meaningful hurt. - Isis, Fri Jan 20 01:30
            “I’m not going anywhere so you don’t need to worry about that.” He said more than that, and all of quite reassuring and kind and wonderful, but that was what stood out. It was an easy thing to say -... more
            • Nathan held Isis, feeling closer to her now than he ever had before, though this was not the first time they had snuggled on a couch before. This was different somehow; deeper. He could almost see... more
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