We are in a muddle
Sat Jul 21, 2018 20:24

“Is Darby good at staring contests?” Eugene immediately asked his opponent all thoughts of Gary quickly vanishing from his mind. Eugene knew that tarantulas had a lot of eyes but he’d never been sure whether extra eyes would be an advantage or a disadvantage in a contest that required staring (which he assumed tarantulas were good at) and avoiding blinking (which was probably even harder if you had lots of eyes). Even if he wasn’t very good at staring contests Eugene supposed Darby might be good at knitting because that seems like an activity which required extra arms and extra eyes. Could you teach tarantulas to knit? Or was it just dogs and birdies that you could get to do fun humanish things? He decided just to ask, “Does Darby make you clothes too?” Eugene thought matching clothes was a really cool idea and if he ever got another pet (probably not a fish- not after Gary) he would try it out. He’d like to dress up as batman and maybe kit out his pet in a robin outfit or they could be catwoman- but not if the pet was already a cat because that didn’t seem as much fun without the pretending part. Maybe he could get a tarantula too! It seemed like a very good pet for a wizard. He wondered if most wizards had tarantulas. Did they deliver mail too or was that just the owls?

Eugene felt like such an idiot for just waving his stick around like that. Of course that would be dangerous! It was like shaking a bottle of soda and just twisting open the bottle cap without any consideration for who was standing nearby. He swept his eyes around the room in a brief moment of panic. How would he know if he’d zapped someone’s butt off?! Were magic wounds like normal wounds? Would it be all bloody? He didn’t see any blood and it looked like everyone still had their butts. “Sorry,” he called out to the entire room, “I’m really sorry if I zapped your butt off!” There. At least he’d apologized so they couldn't be too mad about it. Oh wait. He’d forgotten- he had a butt to look after too. Eugene used his free hand to double-check that it was still there (he was never gonna let his wand near his butt again) and yuuup all was good. Phew. Eugene had been so close to becoming the boy with no butt! He was never gonna take his butt for granted again.

Eugene liked the idea of a club especially a special magic one. He’d never been in a club before. Well one time he’d tried to start a ghost hunting club but it didn’t really take off. This may have been because they never found any ghosts but Eugene was pretty sure that was because the other club members just weren’t committed enough. He had tried to explain that the ghosts would only come out at night or in a graveyard or somewhere especially old and spooky but everyone always talked out ‘bedtimes’ and ‘parents’ so he’d never actually got to stage a successful midnight stakeout.

If the girl was going to be his teacher and not his opponent then Eugene really ought to introduce himself. “I’m Eugene! I don’t have a lot of wizard friends yet but when I get some it’d be really cool to have a club and learn more magic stuff- like you! Can you pull a rabbit out of a hat?” After a moment he remembered about the handshake and stuck out his left hand. His right hand remained preoccupied pointing his wand toward the ground (but away from his toes because toes were almost as important as butts so he’d like to keep them) because that was how you held scissors so it made sense to Eugene that it would be the safest way to carry his stick.

  • Well this is a jumble - Katherine, Fri Jul 20 10:37
    “It’s okay,” Katherine reassured the first-year in front of her. “I like tarantulas more. I didn’t bring Darby today but I can totally go and get him after class! He’ll be your best friend probably,... more
    • We are in a muddle - Eugene, Sat Jul 21 20:24
      • Eugene was a weird name, but Katherine knew that she was going to be a great role model for him already. It seemed like he was asking good questions, like whether Darby was good at staring contests... more
        • Time to put it to bed - Eugene, Sun Jul 29 15:26
          “What’s a stoat? Is it an animal? How many legs does it ha- wait how many legs does a termite have? I’m trying to find an animal with seventeen legs- for my brother’s birthday. He’s going to be... more
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