Do I need a magnifying glass?
Mon Jan 14, 2019 09:52

“Because she appointed herself captain of the Morality Police,” Elliot spiced up the answer to Eugene’s question. Kit had been very clear that she was biting him because he had sworn in her presence. Who was she, the Pope? Didn’t matter. Elliot would swear in front of the Pope too. See how Her Holiness liked that.

Fierceness wasn’t just a girl trait—actually, redacted, as Elliot thought about the women in his life as compared to the men and there was really no question about it. His dad was a shy nerd and his mom owned a freakin’ nightclub. His godmother could probably kill a man with a high-heeled shoe and winged eyeliner. His sister was like a cross between the Tasmanian Devil and Veruca Salt. That was why he was going to send Ariana a potion that would give her corns (see how her gymnastics practice went then) and make boogers ooze out of her nose. While he was very very very far away so she couldn’t retaliate. At least not right away. And hopefully there’d be something to distract her when school ended, or she’d go easy on him because it was his birthday right after he got back from RMI.

No, that was a pretty dumb hope. There was no way she’d go easy on him just because it was his birthday.

And see, Eugene was making exactly his point. Elliot had always thought Kit was okay, even if she mostly just wanted to watch the same movie over and over, but now that she had a whole stupid anti-profanity campaign she was showing her true colors, which were, like, beige and eggshell boring. Even though she had awesome pets, which was grossly unfair. Why did someone like Kit get to have a pet tarantula and then a lizard when Elliot couldn’t have pets? (Not that he really wanted a pet but it was the principle of the thing.)

Elliot wasn’t convinced by Eugene’s theory that every single thing that went wrong at RMI had been caused by ghosts, but he was already waist-deep in this ghost conversation with no clear exit. Also, everything Eugene was saying would make an amazing video game. Having to fight ghosts and their magical teenage bodyguards in a haunted school? Yeah, Elliot would totally buy that and shell out for DLC. “But ghosts can’t touch stuff, right?” he asked, not sure on the rules in this universe. He was pretty sure only poltergeists could actually touch things. “So how are they doing it? We’d need to know that if we were gonna stop them.”

  • Optional - Eugene, Sun Dec 30 15:29
    “She BIT you,” Eugene repeated, voice rising shrilly above the noisy classroom. “Why did she bite you?” Kit had always seemed fairly normal to Eugene. She was fun, and smart, and not at all like his... more
    • Do I need a magnifying glass? - Elliot, Mon Jan 14 09:52
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