Dardanius Dubois
I feel like things were left unsaid
Fri Jan 26, 2018 15:24

This term had been weird so far. Danny thought he’d made a good start, accomplishing commendable progress getting over Marissa, and ignoring the butterflies he still got whenever he was around Holland. Until they came into his dormitory and said… well nothing, really. That they maybe liked him back? What was he supposed to do with that? Then nothing.

Now Danny was distracted every time Holland was around him, which was all the time. Not every class, but several of them, and every Quidditch practice, and most meals in the Diner, and in the commons, and whenever they hung out as a group. It was exhausting. Not only that, but as class finished up, Professor Boot handed back his first assignment of the year with a large ‘A’ written on the top corner. Danny stared at it. He hadn’t received an A in History of Magic before. Ever. Seventh year was really not the time for his grades to be slipping. He slipped the paper quickly into his bag, but possibly not before others had seen the grade if they had been looking his way. He wasn’t in the habit of concealing his grades - he’d never felt the need before.

As the class filed out of the room, Dardanius realized he had to do, or say something. Impulsively he took hold of Holland’s hand - he’d never held Holland’s hand before, but he wanted to do it, and he had reason to believe they wouldn’t object - and diverted them both behind a statue and through a concealed entrance into a dimly lit passageway. He walked several strides before coming to a halt and looking around them - including above, in case that mischief-loving poltergeist was around - to be certain they would not be overheard. “Hi. Sorry,” he started awkwardly, because whenever he had anything of any significance to say, all useful words evaporated from his mind. “I just wanted to apologize. I feel like things have been weird between us. Again.”

It wasn’t the same sort of awkwardness as last term; after he spontaneously told Holland he was attracted to them, Danny had tried to avoid their company, and when together in a group they stayed apart from each other, making limited eye contact. Yet since Holland had told him they maybe liked him, too, there had been another alteration in their interactive behaviours, this time with quite different effects.

Danny was not avoiding being alone with Holland, although when it happened he couldn’t think of anything to say, and he couldn’t stop watching them, as if they were going to suddenly do something extraordinary and if he blinked he’d miss it. When they were together with other people, Danny found himself making excuses to touch Holland, with occasional pressure on their arm or shoulder in conversation, or he’d intentionally sit too close on a couch or chair purely to experience being alongside them. Whenever their eyes met it felt deliberate, like they were sharing a secret (which he supposed was accurate). Wherever Danny went, Holland was there, and Danny’s heart rate fluctuated like he was suffering from arrhythmia, his concentration lapsing as though he were an overstimulated toddler.

“I can’t stop thinking about - you know.” He met Holland’s gaze and had that feeling again, like an exclusive connection; it felt special, but intimidating, like he wasn’t entitled to such a responsibility. He quickly averted his focus to the wall past their shoulder, instead. “It’s distracting.” Despite the genuine nature of his apology, Danny found his lips twitching upwards into an expression of abashed indulgence.

    • Some things are better left unsaid - Holland Keene, Fri Jan 26 17:09
      Holland was barely out of the History of Magic classroom when Danny took their hand without preamble. It was like being shocked without static, a buzzing feeling that coursed through them from their... more
      • They say actions speak louder than words - Dardanius, Sat Jan 27 09:31
        Danny distantly registered that his hand felt empty now, and then suddenly they were talking about this. Not just about it being awkward, and them both acknowledging that, but about reasons. Which in ... more
        • Then try taking action - Holland, Sat Jan 27 11:41
          In the spring, Danny’s attraction to Holland didn’t matter became of Marissa, but that clearly wasn’t the case anymore. Holland hadn’t outright said they meant Danny when they talked to Marissa the... more
          • That sounds like an encouragement - Danny, Sat Jan 27 14:18
            Danny blinked. “I don’t know,” he replied, almost automatically, feeling like a mooncalf caught in wandlight. He hadn’t thought about it - he hadn’t realized there was any reason for him to think... more
            • But you’re still all talk - Holland, Sat Jan 27 20:11
              How was that fair? All dating was a maybe. You went on a date to see if maybe you liked each other enough in that way to go on another date, and if you still liked each other then maybe the... more
              • I feel some discussion is warranted - Danny, Sun Jan 28 06:22
                He hadn’t given much thought to pulling Holland aside for this conversation: he had been driven by distraction, and confusion. If forced to give a reason for being in the passages at that moment he... more
                • Talk is cheap - Holland, Sun Jan 28 11:40
                  “Right,” Holland said curtly, ignoring the sinking sensation in their stomach. “ I don’t know wasn’t the same as “no,” but it was close enough. Holland had never asked anyone out before (well, there... more
                  • So show me some action - Danny, Sun Jan 28 15:38
                    Danny emitted a vexed huff of dissatisfaction. He understood why Holland wasn’t thrilled with that response, but what did they want him to say? That sure they could just go on a few dates like nobody ... more
                    • Is that a proposition? - Holland, Sun Jan 28 20:34
                      Holland once again had the feeling, like they had gotten last year in the Lyra practice room, that they were having this conversation wrong—like they were being tested on a chapter they hadn’t... more
                      • Let's say Yes - Danny, Mon Jan 29 09:53
                        “I am interested .” Finally Holland had said something definitive. “I like you.” The tightness in Danny’s chest was alleviated, and it was sensational to hear those words spoken, but they did not... more
                        • I can’t just yet - Holland, Mon Jan 29 12:41
                          Holland sighed. Sure, now that Danny had said they should both just forget about this and Holland had agreed, why not explore a scenario in which they had gone on successful dates and wanted to keep... more
                          • Tease - Danny, Tue Jan 30 06:44
                            “Right,” he agreed immediately that Holland had practise handling situations. They had previously discussed that dating was easier for Danny than it was for Holland; just because it was suddenly less ... more
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