Professor Arthur Bennett
Bamboozled By Billywigs [Magizoobotany, Years 4-7]
Tue Dec 12, 2017 01:33

Arthur was floating. Literally. Hovering a few inches off the ground, he looked like a veritable angel of chaos: he was, for some reason, barefoot, generally covered in dirt, glasses askew, and his tawny hair, like the rest of his body, was defying gravity. He was a sight to see, though students more familiar with his general antics would likely be less surprised than might be expected.

“Come in, everyone, and shut the door, quick! QUICK!” He grinned triumphantly as the last student slammed the door of the greenhouse shut. “Ha ha! Excellent! Now gather ‘round, everyone! I’m so glad you could make it.” Now granted, this specific Magizoobotany class was mandatory for all upper years, but it had also been scheduled about 15 minutes ago, so really, everyone’s appearance was worth applauding. Thank goodness Professor Boot had wandered into the greenhouse right after the billywigs escaped. It was really just incredibly fortuitous and not at all suspicious. And it had been so helpful of him to alert the staff members of the dilemma and join them in herding the older kids over. Yes, that Professor Boot was an upstanding sort. Arthur beamed at the students, unconsciously itching the string of rather large purple welts going up his arms.

“So,” he said, suddenly serious, “we have a situation at hand. And it’s a great learning opportunity too!” He grimaced. “I keep forgetting I should be quiet,” he mumbled to himself. He looked around the room suspiciously before turning back to the students and whispering, “Here’s the deal. About 40 billywigs are loose in the greenhouse. And it’s up to us to catch them.” Then, because he was Arthur, he gave up all pretense of being quiet and crowed enthusiastically: “Isn’t that great?! This is what Magizoobotany is all about! Unexpected situations where you have to grapple with creatures and face the unknown, with just your wand and your wits to guide you!” Unhappy with the amount of enthusiasm the students were showing, he continued, “We are about to embark on the ultimate adventure! An adventure of…of… the soul, of the heart!”

It was then that he was bopped on the head by a honking daffodil, and a strangely silent one at that. “Oh all right, all right, I know, I know, my friend. Okay.” Arthur attempted to pat the plant on its supposed head but got bopped again instead. Turning back to the class, he said, “I silenced them so you could hear me properly. They’re not happy about it. The entire greenhouse is actually in an uproar. The chomping cabbage has shredded most of the seasonal guide, the daffodils are staging a mutiny, and the flutterby bushes are emitting unappealing odors out of sheer anxiety. The poor things. But it's nothing we can't handle!”

Without another word, Arthur launched himself off a pot and right into a dirigible plum plant, sending several blue, snitch-sized creatures flying. “Stupefy!” It was a direct hit. One of the creatures came to a sudden halt and dropped right into Arthur’s hands. Panting slightly, he held the creature up with pride. “This is a billywig. Very blue, very fast, and they’ve got a sting to ‘em. As you can see, I’ve been stung several times,” he said, gesturing at the welts on his arms. “It’s not too painful, like a bee sting, really, and all it does is make you float a bit and feel a little giddy. The effects wear off pretty quickly, say in 5-10 minutes, unless you’ve been stung as much as I have.” He grinned at his arms ruefully. “I’ve probably got another half hour of floating left.”

As the billywig in his hand started to stir, Arthur placed it gently in a large cage on the floor. “So there you have it! Use whatever means necessary to catch the little bubs, but be careful not to hurt them or any of the plants in the room. Gloves and other equipment are in the usual spots. I recommend working in groups as it’s a bit easier if you can corner them. Now off you go!”

Once the students bustled away, Arthur cast a quick finite incantatem, undoing the silencing spell he’d cast earlier. Almost instantaneously, the room was filled with the noise of distressed plants, the buzzing of wings, and general mayhem. With a contented sigh, Arthur prepared to launch himself at another group of plants. This was Magizoobotany at its finest.


Hi everyone! I 100% cackled the entire time while writing this post.

Usual rules apply, double points for the longest thread. Please keep in mind that there aren’t any terribly dangerous creatures or plants in the greenhouse. Tag Arthur only if you absolutely need him to launch himself in your student’s direction, but don’t tag each other, yeah?

Have fun!

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      • Making it was the easy part. - Emmett Lawrence, Wed Jan 3 15:37
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        • Re: Making it was the easy part. - Camilla, Wed Jan 3 17:00
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    • Least of my problems - Dardanius Dubois, Wed Dec 20 16:22
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      • Yeah, I don't care about the rest of them. Or this one. - Maverick Buchannan, Fri Dec 29 09:50
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        • So compassionate - Dardanius , Sat Dec 30 15:58
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    • Not my ideal way to spend a day - Myfanwy Owen, Wed Dec 20 09:47
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      • This isn't anyone's ideal day - Elijah Carthy, Wed Dec 20 11:36
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        • What would you prefer? - Myfanwy, Wed Dec 20 15:07
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          • Anything but this. - Elijah, Fri Dec 29 16:01
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            • It could be worse - Myffi, Thu Jan 4 07:43
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              • Could it? - Elijah, Thu Jan 4 16:09
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      • You’re telling me - Holland Keene, Tue Dec 19 14:57
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        • I can tell you more things! - Marissa, Sun Dec 24 15:11
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          • Holland took the billywig from Marissa, careful not to injure it, and deposited it in the cage that Professor Bennett had set up. They hoped the Magizoobotany professor had set up the cage so that... more
            • Okay, but what if you did? - Marissa, Thu Dec 28 21:37
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              • That sounds like a bad idea - Holland, Fri Dec 29 15:55
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    • Not our usual type of mayhem - Rose Farnon, Sat Dec 16 13:07
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        • I hate to break it to you, bud... - Rose, Sat Dec 23 15:50
          Of course it was Russell. Rose would have scowled at that realization if she hadn’t been busy wondering how many billywig stings it would take for her to start floating like Professor Bennett. As far ... more
          • Russell, who had already been feeling significantly less energized than the riled-up foliage around them, wilted even further at her snapped response. It was somewhat surprising (a good type of... more
            • I'm glad you came prepared - Rose, Sun Dec 31 22:20
              As Russell continued to speak, Rose continued to stare at him flatly, wondering if he had even listened to a word she had said. Well, it was clear that he had listened, but it wasn’t clear if he had... more
              • Um I'm never prepared - Russell, Wed Jan 3 15:19
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                • Then I take it back - Rose, Sun Jan 7 10:19
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