Suspicious is my middle name
Tue Feb 6, 2018 12:38

It seems like the perfect time for both of you,” Marissa said, demonstrating a very loose understanding of the adjective. She was right about one thing: if nothing happened here and now, nothing ever would. Holland wasn’t yet sure whether or not that was a bad thing. Support and friendship aside, the thing that Marissa didn’t seem to understand was that giving it a try wasn’t likely. There were still Holland’s concerns about the veracity of their feelings, and the question of whether Danny would actually be interested. Holland was still on the fence about how to describe how they felt, but they continued to believe it didn’t matter. It being their last year at RMI made things more difficult, not less. Holland was excited and nervous about college, and the promise and threat of next year was never far from their mind. Marissa talked about this like it was so easy.

“Thanks,” Holland said, feeling more-or-less uneasy. The likelihood of anything lasting between Holland and Danny was slim, because of their ages and life stages and, more broadly, because of who each of them was. Although, as Holland had pointed out to Danny more than once, dating didn’t always have to have a long-term goal. He’d clearly been able to date Marissa without the expectation of permanency. Then again the situation with them would necessarily be different; Holland wasn’t just a wizarding girl who lacked a pedigree, which rendered most of the discussions they’d had with Danny about Marissa inapplicable.

Still. Maybe it was that easy—at least, as easy as saying something and having Danny decide what he wanted next. Holland didn’t have a clear idea of what they wanted, but maybe Danny did. That could clear things up for them. There was the pureblood issue, but, Holland realized, they weren’t actually obligated to think about that. It was up to Danny to determine how problematic that was. If he felt that it was an insurmountable obstacle, then there was really nothing more to be said. Which was probably what would happen, and that would be the end of it, then.

Marissa was right. Not about trying, necessarily, but that if Holland made a clean breast of things then they wouldn’t wonder anymore. They were tired of debating the subject with themself; it was time for a new topic. “‘Perfect’ is a stretch, but you’re not wrong,” Holland acknowledged. “Just thinking about it hasn’t made a difference.” Not a positive one, at least. It was time for a new topic here, too. “Anything you’re still wondering about this year? I guess now’s the time to be giving things a try.”

  • Don't be suspicious - Marissa, Thu Feb 1 20:45
    Excellent. Holland was someone who sometimes got lost in thought. After knowing the Lyra for about seven years at this point, Marissa knew what Holland’s different types of silence were. There was... more
    • Suspicious is my middle name - Holland, Tue Feb 6 12:38
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