Emmett Lawrence
Objectively the most laughable sentence ever, but go on.
Wed Apr 12, 2017 02:22
67.140.82.232

He laid in the floor surrounded by an ocean of his failures, partially atop and partially beneath things like laundry and books, as if he’d been spinning around in circles and simply toppled over. The world was just too confusing and rough to also truly contend with gravity, so he let it have its win. Emmett had been trying to do some studying before bed, but his arms got tired holding up his textbook - the gravity thing, man - so now it just sat across his face, almost like a teepee, as he wondered idly if he could learn by osmosis. He couldn’t, though, which was truly unfortunate.

But he had better stuff to think about than boring schoolwork. Namely, Holland, and now his best friend was accidentally completely about to destroy both their lives. They were going out (or making out? It didn’t seem very Official Relationship-y yet, although there had been an Actual Date in there) with Ruben Lundaghkhkag. He was glad Holland seemed happy so far and whatever, but Emmett hated that dude. For one thing, he was scary. For another, he was encroaching on Emmett’s friendgroup by existing and being an actual fifth year as opposed to his own honorary status with the group. Also, his hair was too perfect, which meant that soon it would be wrapped around Holland’s little finger, and, contrary to the usual meaning of the metaphor, that did not actually land them in the benefitting position.

So there were a lot of reasons - most of which Emmett made up in his own head - that this was a Bad Thing. But he couldn’t say that to Holland until the reasons were less arguably Very Stupid, so he had to just stew in them. At least his stewing was interrupted by a voice on the other side of the door, in this case belonging to Danny. “Come on in,” said Emmett without getting up from the floor.

Danny did just that, making himself comfortable as he slid off his slippers and hopped into Emmett’s bed. The younger boy did, at least, remove the book that had been sitting on his face, because he wasn’t a total barbarian. Danny’s inquiry was far too casual for someone visiting at an hour of late evening/early night worthy of pajamas. (Actually, what the hell time was it? Too much stewing, he thought to himself, realizing that he didn’t know how much time had passed.)

“Oh, it goes, I guess,” he replied with equal casualness, sitting up a bit. “How about you? Having a good evening?” Emmett figured Danny had to be pretty bored to come knocking on his door, but he hoped his friend had something interesting to say, anyway.

  • Seeking Counsel with Emmett - Dardanius Dubois, Sat Apr 8 15:31
    He’d been having a particularly unfocused evening. On any given day, Dardanius could procrastinate better than most, but this evening was proving to be particularly unproductive. He had attempted a... more
    • Objectively the most laughable sentence ever, but go on. - Emmett Lawrence, Wed Apr 12 02:22
      • See you're speaking sense already - Dardanius , Wed Apr 12 16:13
        By now Danny was sufficiently accustomed to the state of Emmett’s room that he no longer felt the need to comment on it, but he could still be in awe at how a person could live and function in such a ... more
        • That could change any moment. - Emmett, Wed Apr 12 22:41
          Emmett sympathized with Danny’s lack of homework focus. Another few minutes and he might have actually fallen asleep in the floor beneath his textbook. Maybe there was just something in the air... more
          • Forewarned is forearmed - Danny, Thu Apr 13 08:30
            Without the wider context being verbally acknowledged, Emmett seemed to know the exact frame of reference for Danny’s question. He also seemed to harbour some reservations, which, Danny realised, he... more
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