I found your map...
Thu Dec 14, 2017 16:47

Holland apologized. Danny looked at them, and blinked. Why was Holland apologizing? Okay, they’d said some stuff that had caused distress, but Danny hadn’t apologized for the original grievance of intentionally trying to separate Holland from Ruben. If he’d have realized that encouraging Kaye towards the game of volleyball earlier would have started this mess he’d just have gotten up when she arrived and gone swimming or something instead. Maybe spent the whole party behind the waterfall with Marissa.

There was a weird silence, and Danny felt like he should probably apologize, too. He didn’t want it to just sound like he was saying sorry because Holland had said it, though. Danny was sorry. He shouldn’t have interfered with Holland’s private life, especially as his motives hadn’t turned out to be quite so selfless as he’d had his conscious self believe. He opened his mouth to tell them so, but Holland chose that moment to speak again. To ask a ridiculous question.

Dardanius stared at Holland. The conversation had meandered, twisted and turned around so much since they’d started it, he supposed the question was as relevant as any other. “Uh,” he stalled as he tried to dredge the tangled mass of thoughts and feelings he’d had since coming back to Lyra for any gem that might be valuable in answering. He wasn’t Holland’s best friend; that was Emmett, and Danny had no intention of usurping Emmett. He also had established that he wasn’t in a relationship with Holland, and had no interest in dating them: he was with Marissa, and ecstatically happy about that. Besides, Holland wasn’t even a… It doesn’t matter. At all. Huh.

Okay then, but just being good friends with someone was a reason to want to be close to them, wasn’t it? Dardanius had considered that Holland was - what were the words? Oh, yes - smart and supportive, they always looked amazing… Right. He glanced at the cute floral shorts they were wearing and rapidly hauled his eyes back up again. Well. That didn’t mean anything. As he’d acknowledged to Kaye earlier, he could look at a person and find them physically attractive without being attracted to them. Of course the fact that he had definitely fantasized about kissing Holland before suggested that might not be accurate in this instance. He’d told Kaye she could never seduce Danny, but he suspected the same was not true of the Lyra stood just across from him.

Well, then. For such a poignant realization, Dardanius felt the moment was disappointingly anti-climatic. He suspected he ought to be feeling a lot more… something. Surprise, or panic, or embarrassment, or something. Instead it felt as though this whole, excruciating interlude had been presented in inscrutable code, and now he was suddenly in possession of the key that made sense of it all. The trouble was that Holland was asking for the translation.

“I guess it’s…” he started, then hesitated. He couldn’t just say that, could he? Danny considered that any reservations he might have - and he had several - were relevant at this moment. What about Holland? Holland was one of his closest friends, and this could make things very weird between them: they might not want to hear that Danny might think about them differently to the way he thoughts about his other friends. Yet he couldn’t possibly keep something like this from Holland - Danny was very familiar with his shortcomings in expressing falsehoods with any credibility. Then what about Marissa? None of this had changed anything at all about how Danny felt about her. Why now? They had finally managed to sort out their differences enough to start actually dating, and the past few weeks had been incredible - everything was going so well. “Damn,” Danny hissed, barely above a whisper.

He looked at Holland. Merlin damn it all. Danny took a breath, let out a short laugh that nicely summed up how ludicrous this really was, and said, “It matters because Ruben’s not the only one here who likes you like that.”

  • First we need a map - Holland, Thu Dec 14 12:27
    “ It doesn’t matter, ” Danny agreed. Holland exhaled, unnoticed tension leaving their shoulders. They’d known that. They knew Danny; it had never felt like that mattered, not since first year before... more
    • I found your map... - Danny, Thu Dec 14 16:47
      • This is not the map you’re looking for - Holland, Thu Dec 14 21:01
        “ It matters because Ruben’s not the only one here who likes you like that. ” Holland stared blankly at Danny. For a long moment, they didn’t understand— who —and then the right neurons fired... more
        • Oh. Whoops. - Danny, Thu Dec 14 22:10
          He had no idea what to expect when those words had left his mouth. Danny almost wished he could take them back, but the truth remained it was absolutely impossible he would be able to keep something... more
          • Maybe a cartographer would help - Holland, Fri Dec 15 03:26
            For the first time in this entire conversation, Danny said exactly what Holland expected him to. “ Then nothing. ” That was the right answer, Holland thought, with something almost like relief.... more
            • Do you know any? - Danny, Fri Dec 15 14:51
              Holland didn’t sit with Danny, but they did move towards the door. For a stomach-lurching second, Danny thought they were just going to leave. He suspected both of them had considered vacating the... more
              • Afraid not - Holland, Sat Dec 16 22:56
                It sounded like Danny wasn’t going to get in the way if Holland wanted to flirt with Ruben again. Ultimately, that assurance was what Holland had wanted, although they could say with some certainty... more
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